The art of replacing a bad habit with a good one

It's not always necessary. Sometimes you can just stop doing the thing, deal with the withdrawal symptoms for a while, and it works itself out.

But with Reddit it was different. My problem wasn't doomscrolling; I was actively engaging:

• A person would ask a question
• my brain would go "oh I know that one!"
• I would proceeed to answer that question
• the OP would thank me
• then someone out of nowhere, and sometimes after days, weeks, months and even years have passed, would reply with a very insulting response about how wrong I am, and how I should read this book, this research study, this YouTube video, this article, "this is not what [ the name of some influencer who doesn't even have a real job ] said"...
• then like an idiot, I would respond with something like "I need not do any of those things, because I'm talking from personal experience. The whole reason I was so excited to share is because this is an actual solution that has solved the same problem for me, has helped me immensely, and I had such huge success with it. So I shared it in case it helps the OP. I thought I was allowed to do that."

You see, for me, personal experience and tangible results holds a higher place than whatever the influencer of the month is theorizing, or whatever the "publish or perish" so-called scientists have to "conclude" with their self-reported questionnaires of 49 people about what they ate 10 years ago, that they call "research study" and which is most of the times funded from companies like Kellogg's and Coca-Cola and Nestle, and pretty much every single supplement company.

I've done all that before. I read books (and textbooks) every day. I used to read several research studies every day too (once you realize how fake most of them are (hence the contradictions and entire retraction databases filled with these "research studies"), you eventually find it pointless to keep reading.) I took university courses on these subjects. I trialed and errored. I professionally worked with most methods I shared.

But the thing is, Reddit is just a place to host echo chambers and pity parties with some of the most narrow-minded and dogmatic folks, who seem to have a lot of time on their hands. Despite staying truthful and respectful, attack is imminent and a downvote button alone is not cutting it for these people.

So why do I seek out this engagement, and how can I replace it in a healthier manner?

This is where the art of replacing a bad habit with a good one comes in. And it's actually pretty simple:

Self-awareness.

Ask yourself: 

• Why do you seek out this activity? 
• What does it provide for you? 
• Which healthier activity can provide all those things too?

When I had Facebook, Instagram, Snapchat, Twitter, YouTube etc it was basically:

• stay updated with what's happening with my distant relatives and friends
• share my own news, problems, accomplishments, experiences
• have fun discussions
• learn things

So my replacement habits to the above that got me free from all of them are:

• spend more time with family in real life
• journal and reflect
• have daily long conversations through email with just one distant friend who also got rid of social media at the same time I did
• read books, watch lectures from various universities, and enroll in courses

And it worked! 7+ years I haven't missed those social media platforms and YouTube is confined and restricted to just those university lectures. I don't use it for anything else.

But Reddit scratched a different itch. It wasn't about updates and staying "connected" with people I already know. It was about helping strangers! It was about sharing my experiences in case some may find useful in their own life.

That's when I realized: I stopped blogging when I went back to school, thinking "I will not have time". Well, you certainly had time for Reddit, didn't you Soph?

So upon reflecting on this, I understood. I need this. This creative outlet. Because life is not just about work, studies and taking care of your loved ones.

I used to compose music to fill that void. I don't do that anymore. It was... isolating to say the least. And I can't hyperfocus on it now as a parent of 2 children, one of them severely autistic. So writing is apparently the second best thing, as it only takes an hour or 2 to write a blog post from beginning to end, as opposed to not eat, not sleep, not make contact with humans for days!

So this is how I'm replacing Reddit. By coming back to blogging. I'll let you know how it goes.

If you want to try it as well, I have to say, you don't have to go all in right away. If you don't want the hassle and expenses of setting up and hosting and maintaining, and you just want to write... Google's free Blogger platform is a great start. That's what I'm still using in fact. And you can of course backup and export everything: your blog posts, your templates etc. I personally just save posts (and a list of ideas for new ones etc) where they are originally written: in my plain .txt file.

And please, don't use AI. This is a creative outlet. Keep it that way. The readers need your personal touch. Nevermind your writing skills. They'll improve with practice.

I'll end this with a link to one of my favorite blogs I enjoy reading. In this blog post, he explains the benefits of personal blogging beautifully.

https://mikegrindle.com/posts/personal-blogging